25. Being busy

Being busy is always something we yearn for when we're not busy. The grass is always greener on the other side.

I was just in a situation where I did have a lot of time; a year or whatever in this pandemic weirdness, summer, then even going back to uni- I found it relatively easy on my time. Recently I've just acquired a new job, and life is a lot more hectic. In combination with Church, running, writing, going out with friends- it's a lot to balance.

But it’s through being busy that you work out the stuff that really matters to you.

The big problem is that when you're not busy you accept everything to avoid the notion you actually are bored. We feel uncomfortable in our own company and simply doing nothing so say yes to everything.

This leads to your yes’ losing value.

Saying no more highlights to people that you're a busy person and ultimately they won't mess you around recognising your time is valuable.

Similarly, I found the more time I have, the less productive I become.

Parkinson’s Law highlights this- work expands to fill the time allotted for its completion.

I see this happening all around me. If you have a long 8-hour shift, but the work is not keeping you busy what do you do? you're gonna do your tasks incredibly slow, incredibly unproductively just so you just move away from feeling like your not doing nothing.

But when you have so much on your plate you have to be efficient. Your brain shifts from ‘I’ll do this sometime’ to ‘I’ll do this as soon as I get a little spare time’. You become more grateful for time and use it better.

So you navigate how to fit all your work in.

It's no simple task though because we are conditioned to look longingly at those days where we are just relaxing.

You wonder why going on holiday, celebrating and partying are the most popular posts on social media? Because they don’t challenge the viewer to get off their ass. Yet, when you are off your backside working so hard you think you should be on a beach because that is what ‘everyone else is doing’.

Ultimately nobody did anything interesting by being the same… but that’s a whole different debate.

Anyways I believe staying busy is what we all actually desire. I think inside of us all; we want to achieve something, we want to make a difference, we want to feel like we are doing something. Being busy is an objective representation of that.

The problem is we want to be busy with easy things- but it is consistently remaining busy with hard tasks which is a necessity within the graft of reaching success in a given field.

Being busy by doing the hard stuff is tough though because we always see the end picture which is romanticised on social media. We don't see the practice, the hard hours, the labouring alone behind the desk.

So I'm busy now, but I'm not complaining.

I'm using this time to sculpt a better version of myself. Busyness enables me to prepare myself for the future. It prepares my heart for a better perspective for new opportunities- potentially unattainable beforehand if I was idle the whole time.

If you can be effective in time you don’t have any control over and remain calm and productive in events you don’t initiate think of how you will be in situations you do control?

Instead of meandering around trying to fill the space, I hope you see busyness in this new perspective.

24. The consistency formula

Doing something every day is easy.

All you have to do is follow this formula:

consistency = having a strong why + a good environment + constant inspiration

If you have all three of those things, you will never fail.

The strong why pushes you when you feel demotivated. You dig deep as you know what you need to do because you're looking long-term. It gives you a hyper-focus.

A good environment gets rid of distractions. It makes it easier for yourself on days where you just don't want to get out, days you don't want to write, days you just don't feel like doing anything. Make it easier for yourself and create/ get in a good environment.

Constant inspiration keeps you in your childlike awe. It pushes to create when no one else is, to push the boundaries, and to be adventurous. Look around to other people in your field and make sure you are constantly getting excited.

Personally, I sometimes struggle writing every single day.

Even now I'm writing this late at night when I should be in bed. No one will probably read this, but you know why I do it? Because I don't want to drop the ball. I don't want to not be consistent. That to me is accepting defeat and mediocrity.

It sounds extreme but it’s because I’ve engrained my habits and the formula into me.

It's because my why is so strong. I want to become really great at what I do. For that, I need to stay consistent. Writing every day is the logical avenue towards that.

I have a good environment because ultimately I'm making it as easy as possible for me to write. Although I've had a really, really busy day. I have enabled this blog to go up really quickly. In a rush, I often dictate my blogs and transfer the words over, I have hundreds of ideas to already decide from the idea book I take everywhere and I don’t allow myself distraction with social media. Even in a bad physical space, you can make your environment good.

I also recognise and get inspired by other people like Seth Godin as he writes every single day that is super inspiring to me. I see him achieving great things and writing every day was a major role in that. So I do it.

Often it is simply taking action on a consistent basis where people fall short. It is the thing that actually provides the most results. People come up with ideas, they follow through but they don’t fall in love with the process (or at least make the process easy enough for long enough for them to fall in love with).

So that combination of those three makes this ability to stay so consistent really easy for me and ultimately I’ve applied it to enable me to write really solidly for close to a month so far.

People complain when they can't stay consistent with something because they are lacking maybe one or two of these things.

So if you have all three then you're set, you're golden, but you can’t be cocky and burnout- you have to continuously top them up.

So remember the formula and get to work!

consistency = having a strong why + a good environment + constant inspiration

23. Why you should be selfish

I think we're conditioned to believe that being selfish is the polar opposite of being selfless.

I’m increasingly starting to believe that ‘the notion that to do things for yourself’ can be serving others well.

You know yourself best, better than anyone else; and it is through this knowledge of yourself that you can serve the world.

I think more often than not we like big group dynamics wherein people put this agenda on to you, telling you how you can best play a role in the world. It can be dangerous.

Don't get me wrong. I believe we should all play a role in service and caring for others and loving each other.

Yet if this is not in alignment with how as an individual we best work and function in the world, we've got something wrong there.

Ultimately, we need to be leaning into where our strengths lie- it is in these areas where we can be efficiently working and serving others in ways other people can’t imagine.

We've all got gifts and something unique that we can offer and this doesn’t need to be under the title ‘selfless’.

For me, I've been reflecting upon this recently. Just kind of stepping back a little bit and recognising that you know what I kind of need a bit of time for myself. Putting my head down and doing the things I know will make a difference for not only me but for others too.

I know how I function, what introduces stress and burnout and how hard I can go- this sometimes isn’t as well suited in bigger ‘selfless’ dynamics.

There's this author named Ryan Holiday and he puts it quite well;

“Sometimes you have to disconnect in order to better connect with yourself and with the people you serve”.

I think this is really interesting in regards to it's the nail on the head, I think through being able to step back and truly understand where you reside in life is essential. You can then almost understand your plan of attack. You know, “Okay, I want to help in the world here. I want to work in the world here”. And you can go about it in the best way.

The flip side is, somebody gives you this thing for you to do, and you just plainly accept it. It's not going to be done in the best capacity because it’s through the narrative of someone else’s story.

Obviously, you can try your best with it, but ultimately, it's not something you can function best in.

Yet, there is a need for these instances- team dynamics, other people’s opinions, not taking charge.

But for this dynamically to work there has to be collaboration and communication over where strengths lie, be selfish in where you want to work, how the team dynamics should function, and where you can best serve.

That is where actions are actualised. People work harder seeing opportunities where they personally feel called to make a change. That is only in spaces congruent to personal skills, talents, and individual inclinations.

Orient yourself, your team, and your life this way. It removes much of the inevitable resistance to hard tasks. Be selfish.

Ultimately I am cheating a bit with this title because I do personally believe within us all the desire to be selfless remains- yet the difference is doing it on your terms vs another.

I personally believe the key is being transfixed on ‘doing something well’ as this enables all people to be served best.

I have a few areas in life that I know a little more than the average joe about, so I’m going to be quite stubborn about how I should function in being led through those situations. But it is through areas I know less about (and even the ones that I do know lots about) I often get surprised by how people do offer better ways.

I have to be humble and open to that.

Doing something to the best capacity is what matters at the end of the day- whether on my terms or not.

So I think the challenge is, how can we go into our ways, being so selfish in our time, and leaning in and using that well.

Using the selfish time idea as a tool to serve instead of an ‘I don’t give a F*CK’ about others mentality.

For me, I'm trying to disconnect from other people and lean into what I want to do. But by doing so, I'm going to make a big difference for not only me but for the people I love and for the world at hand.

Doing so enables you to crack the code, get the blueprint, and get on with your plan of attack, and hopefully, it comes to fruition in a bigger way than something that somebody else has told you- detached from where your skills and talents reside.

Be open to refinement, redirection, and pointers once in a while. This then focuses your selfish individual time. Don’t muddle the two up as you’ll get nowhere. Once you have your destination in mind be a slave to the habits and routines that will get you there.

Guess now all there is to do is go out there and make a difference. I wish you all the best.