46. Limiting beliefs

We all have limiting beliefs about ourselves. Things we cannot do- all based on lies we tell ourselves.

One myth I tell myself is that I only have the ability to focus on one thing and I have to reject everything else as a consequence.

The problem with that is I then often work hard for a while and then find myself in burnout. I used to be the person who photography was their everything. Yet, I fell out of love with it. I recognise now that with passions you cannot solely rely on them for your identity and rest.

A sense of inadequacy will inevitably come because you have put all your eggs in one basket.

Don’t get me wrong I’m all for working hard at one thing and getting good at it but we are complex multi-dimensional beings. To limit ourselves to being good at one thing doesn’t make sense.

I’ve come to recognise some facets of my life will be more specialised but that doesn’t devalue the others.

The mindset we adopt predicates any action we can bring about, yet we believe it to be the other way round.

I will feel a certain way because that action occurred.

We must adopt the ability to believe in what we hope to bring into the world. It is often not easy due to doubt from others but through repetition, it becomes easier.

Self-affirmation is necessary in these cases.

Create crazy outrageous goals for yourself and then speak to yourself that they can come to fruition.

You will instinctively push harder as you can’t coast to get the goal.

Set your aims low and you are simply going to work to that.

We can be limitless in our success but it is removing the self-deprecating voice in our own heads and the toxic ones of contemporaries.

Through introspection and evaluating our context regularly we can all get the self-awareness needed to do this.

So I’m going out and trying lots of spontaneous hobbies and skills, all the while believing I have the knowledge and power to sustain this alongside my work and primary focus.

It all starts with belief. Go out there and make a difference!

45. Routines curate space for success

How you do one thing is how you do everything.

Habits are not good enough on their own.

You can hold a great deal of discipline for your work but that doesn’t last forever. When your habits are independent the lack of motivation in one area manifests and you end up losing focus.

Routine creates space for creativity to manifest, ideas to brew, and prolonged periods of the desired focus.

It is impossible to do incredibly difficult tasks on your first attempt but compounding practice allows harder things to be achieved.

6 am starts seem natural, sitting down and writing becomes normal, completing all your to-do lists is easy.

You become wired to the routine.

The same can happen to our detriment.

Our brain becomes hooked on TV, social media, and dopamine.

We fidget until we get our dose of the drug.

And we wonder why people struggle focussing?

Small successes are the best way to start off.

Avoiding the snooze button, making your bed, sitting at your desk.

Repeated daily your brain recognises that is what you should be doing so it becomes easy when motivation subsides.

Planning a whole day out instead of just that morning and evening routine allows for you to progress at an alarming rate.

You don’t fumble about not knowing what you have to do as you are just doing what you did yesterday.

Motivation isn’t needed as you learn to become a slave to the routine realising other ways are unhelpful.

Experiment with the routine and stick to it. Same time, same thing, same dedication- Every day. You’ll change the world.

44. Sitting on the fence

Your actions shouldn’t confuse people with what you believe.

In being distinctive and clear in what you want you not only save time but you attract people who are that way inclined too. When sitting on the fence you are bundled together with people who actually have lots of different opinions but aren’t brave enough to step out. The result of this is that you often feel misunderstood by the rest of the world.

That is not the case though. You have simply not stepped into your particular niche of the world.

Good at lots of things only gets you so far. The master of none mentality is that of an undecided person.

The notion that we have to be 100% confident in all our decisions, relationships, and endeavors is a fallacy.

The thing we do have to recognise is that for true happiness we have to be okay being lonely, getting things wrong, and potentially offending people in experimenting with our hearts desire- all the while being okay in admitting defeat and starting all over again at a moments notice.

However, in my experience the more I dig into my own opinions, the more I am distinctive, the more I move away from the fence- the better I feel.

Sitting on the fence is a comfortable snowball effect that compounds the older you get. You feel you can’t think radically, pursue a new hobby, or enter a new relationship as you have always remained in your safe middle ground.

As the Chinese proverb says: “The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.”

You need to start before you are ready and be radical. As long as you know your why, you can’t really go wrong as failure is inevitable either way.

Regret is worse than rejection. But both sting.

It is this fear of rejection that denies people fully embodying their full genuine self and instead of taking on a more PG version that everyone likes.

You attract the wrong people if you aren’t clear in what you believe and spend a lot of wasted energy along the way.

Saying all this being okay with speaking with people on the opposite side of the spectrum, people sitting on the fence, and with others who believe what you believe is necessary.

Learning from all walks of life actually solidifies your own belief and gives you a sense of empathy for the other side.

A lack of this can lead you to idolise sitting on the fence when in reality you would hate being there but you just are having a rough spot where you currently are- The grass is always greener elsewhere.

Struggles, suffering, and rejection are inevitable responses everywhere but the question is are you willing to take it for being your full genuine self or are you going to take it for a shadow, sitting on the fence version of yourself?

The choice is yours.